I want to extend an offer.

A happy birthday to anyone celebrating their birthday in the current calendar year, along with any future calendar years*.

While the jury is still out on you as a person, life is full of things, and I’m inspired every day seeing you do those things, if you do them, which you may not. I mean, it’s up to you. Maybe you think the land of the living is colourless. I’m not gonna sit here and berate your choices – that’s for strangers on the internet to do!

Anyway, why throw away all of that stuff we’ve done or not done, that meant everything or nothing?

Happy birthday, person.

*This offer is valid up to – and including – the moment of complete brain death.