I can’t for the life of me understand the sensationalist media reports about these ‘neknominations’ that are sweeping the world’s social media platform of choice.
The more of these dicks that die chugging liquor in their driveways like their grandads, the more food there will be for the rest of us, but more importantly – THE INHABITANTS OF THE CANNIBAL RAT GHOST SHIP; ushering in a new world order of bold-faced rat-men, fostering an environment that *some* of us truly embrace and are able to thrive, rising to positions of prominence: becoming dignitaries, educators, and such-like.
When the rat-men terraform Mars, we will be among it’s first inhabitants.
Mars will be a great disappointment – it is blood-red, bulbous, completely uninhabitable beyond the domes; while it’s surface contains no secrets – but eventually we will have the means to penetrate further into space, and it will be our descendants who benefit.
So keep drinking, you dead-eyed fucks, I don’t want to miss my chance with Destiny.
PS – This is my future son-in-law. He’s a nice kid – a graphic designer – but kind of dull.
I think one time he hit my daughter but I can’t prove it.